It’s Time to Shut Up

If you are clueless about your next step, I highly suggest you shut up.

Like, immediately.

Stop talking.

And stop listening to other people talk.

If you’ve been searching for an answer and somehow ended up with 47 different options, 12 opinions, three possible business models, a new morning routine, and somehow less clarity than when you started, keep reading.

I wrote this one with you in mind.

Let’s point out the elephant in the room.

You might be a hoarder of information and ideas.

You might even be low-key addicted to outsourcing your decision-making by collecting as much information as possible without ever actually deciding.

And let’s face it.

Everyone is online yapping.

The yappers are listening to other yappers.

Those yappers are listening to different yappers.

And eventually, everybody starts saying some version of the same thing in a slightly different font.

Do this.

Don’t do that.

Wake up at 5.

Work from anywhere.

Build a personal brand.

Start a newsletter.

Buy the course.

Start the business.

Quit the job.

Invest.

Don’t invest.

Follow your passion.

Find a profitable skill.

Optimize your morning.

Optimize your evening.

Optimize your life.

ENOUGH.

At some point, you have to stop collecting instructions and start observing yourself.

Because here’s the uncomfortable part:

More information does not automatically produce more clarity.

Research on information overload and choice overload has repeatedly found that when the amount of information or number of options increases, decision-making can become more difficult. More choices can create more cognitive load, more comparison, and sometimes less satisfaction with whatever you eventually choose.

Which makes perfect sense when you think about it.

If I give you two options, you can probably choose.

If I give you fifty, suddenly you need a spreadsheet.
😂

And the internet has given us an essentially unlimited spreadsheet.

There is always another video.

Another expert.

Another opinion.

Another strategy.

Another person who has already “figured it out.”

So we keep consuming because it feels productive.

We’re researching.
We’re learning.
We’re preparing.
We’re getting clarity.

Except sometimes we’re doing something much simpler:
We’re avoiding the responsibility of choosing.

Because once you choose, you have to live with the choice.

You have to test it.

You have to be wrong sometimes.

You have to adjust.

You have to own the outcome.

It’s much more comfortable to remain a student forever.

And this is where I think authenticity gets interesting.

Authenticity is both overused and undervalued.

We’re constantly being told to “be yourself,” while simultaneously being exposed to an endless stream of people showing us what ourselves supposedly should look like.

So how exactly are you supposed to hear your own preferences, desires, values and instincts when you’re constantly consuming somebody else’s?

In a noisy world, sometimes the most productive thing you can do is go silent.

I’m not talking about disappearing into your house, ignoring everyone you love and staring at a wall for six months.
😂

I’m talking about intentionally reducing the input.

No new videos.
No new podcasts.
No more “research.”
No explaining your next move to everybody.
No asking five different people what they think you should do.

Just some space.

Space to review.

Replenish.

Refresh.

Reflect.

Because you may not actually have an information problem.

You may have an observation problem.

Your brain needs space to process what it’s already carrying.

There’s even a concept in psychology called incubation, where stepping away from actively working on a problem can sometimes improve your ability to generate insight or solve it later.

And then there’s metacognition: thinking about your own thinking.

That’s the part I want you to practice.

Instead of immediately asking:
“What should I do?”

Try asking:
“Why do I think I need to do this?”

That’s a completely different question.

Because your goals are often connected to a feeling you want to experience.

You might say you want to make more money.

But maybe what you actually want is freedom.

Maybe you want freedom because you want more time.

Maybe you want more time because you want to spend your days doing things you actually enjoy.

But somewhere along the way, you’ve adopted the idea that freedom must be earned through a particular amount of money, a particular career, a particular business model, or a particular version of success.

And now you’re chasing the vehicle instead of the destination.

That’s the kind of thing you can discover when you stop listening long enough to hear yourself.

Ask yourself:

What actually moves me?

Why do I want this particular target?

What feeling am I actually trying to create?

What impact do I want to have on my own life?

What advantages do I already have that I’m overlooking?

If nobody could see or validate this goal, would I still want it?

Those questions may not give you an immediate five-step plan.

That’s okay.

You’re not trying to manufacture certainty.

You’re trying to get close enough to yourself to form a reasonable hypothesis.

And as a self-proclaimed scientist of self, that’s exactly where the experiment begins.

Reduce the noise.

Observe.

Question the assumptions.

Form a hypothesis.

Then test it.

You don’t need to know whether the experiment will work before you run it.

You need enough clarity to take the next measurable step.

So if you’ve been overwhelmed by all the possibilities lately, here’s your assignment:

Shut up.

For a little while.

Stop consuming long enough to notice what remains when nobody is telling you what to want.

You might be surprised by what you hear.

And if you don’t hear anything at first?

Stay quiet a little longer.

The answer doesn’t have to arrive on schedule.

Sometimes clarity needs room.

So give yourself some.

For the next 24 hours, don’t consume anything that tells you what you should do next. No podcasts. No YouTube rabbit holes. No “research.” No asking everybody else what they think.

Just observe yourself.

Pay attention to what keeps coming up when nobody else is talking.

Then write down your hypothesis.

What do you think you should try?

You don’t need to know if it’s the right answer.

You just need to be willing to test it.

That’s the experiment.

And if you want some structure for actually turning that experiment into evidence, that’s exactly what my 100 Days, One You Challenge is designed to help you do.
→ Start your 100-day experiment here.

Don’t take my word for it. Test it yourself.

Until next Saturday, Peace Out Peace In.

-Spivey J.

P.S. Growing up, “shut up” was basically a curse word in my house 😂 So, no, I’m not cursing anybody out in this newsletter. I’m just using some stronger language to grab your attention. Consider it my very direct way of saying: you might need to stop listening to everyone else for a minute.