What Are You Actually Afraid Of?

I’ve been thinking about fear lately.

Not just thinking about it privately, either. I’m addressing it publicly as part of my 100 Days, One You challenge, where I’m testing what happens when I stop waiting to feel ready and actually bet on myself for 100 days.

And if you're tired of waiting to feel ready too, you don't have to wait for a new year, a breakthrough, a perfect plan.

You can start betting on yourself for the next 100 days using this system right here.

Maybe the goal isn't to eliminate fear.

Maybe it's deciding that fear doesn't get to make the decision anymore.

Because the more I examine my own fear, the more I realize something:

Maybe failure isn’t actually the thing we’re afraid of.

So, what are we afraid will happen if we try?

That’s the question I’ve been sitting with.

If you’ve been telling yourself that fear is the reason you haven’t started, changed, launched, moved, created, learned, or finally gone after the thing you’ve been thinking about, I want you to come with me a little deeper.

Because sometimes the fear isn’t about what happens if we fail.

It’s about what happens when we’re seen trying.

Fear of being seen as incompetent

Fear of discovering you aren't capable

Fear of being a beginner

Fear of changing while others don't

Fear of losing excuses and being accountable

The list can go on, but these all feel like fears, but they are actually threats to one's identity.

When a threat is revealed, you can protect it, but the question then becomes...

What are you actually protecting?

That’s the question I want to leave you with.

Not:

“What am I afraid of?”

Go deeper.

What am I protecting myself from?

Embarrassment?

Being a beginner?

Being wrong?

Losing your reputation?

Disappointing someone?

Discovering that you need to learn more?

Being accountable?

Having to change?

Having to leave something behind?

Having to become someone your current identity doesn’t recognize yet?

Because maybe fear isn’t the thing keeping you stuck.

Maybe the protection from fear is.

And eventually you have to decide whether that protection is worth the price.

Because staying stuck sucks.

And at some point, the discomfort of changing has to become smaller than the discomfort of staying exactly where you don’t want to be.

That’s when the experiment begins.

If you’re ready to stop thinking about the life you want and start experimenting with creating it, you can follow along with my 100-day challenge through 100 Days, One You.

And if you’re already in it with me, keep going.

You don’t need to know exactly where this ends.

You just need to be willing to find out.

Peace Out, Peace In.

-Spivey J.


P.S. I’m also talking about this publicly on YouTube as I live through my own 100-day experiment. If you haven’t already, subscribe to the channel and watch the experiment unfold.